Tuesday, January 26, 2010

H.E.L.P

Potty training isn't going well. We've done the videos, we've let Tralee run around naked (in hopes that when she has to go, she'll go in her potty. . . instead she just pees on the floor and comes and tells me, "I go pee pee. Mommy, clean up!"), we've put the potty in the room with her, we've read potty books, we let her watch us use the bathroom, we've said prayers, the list goes on. I need some advice/help with this potty training thing. Or, if you think I need to just wait a few weeks/months and try again, let me know. Here's the latest event that has happened to give you an idea of how this adventure is going:

I set the timer yesterday, and every twenty minutes I told Tralee it was time to go sit on the potty. She kept saying, "No! I don't want to." Some books that I've read said not to force them, because that will only push kids further away from using it. From there I tried to trick her by not using the word potty, and just say, "Tralee, come with Mommy" while leading her towards the bathroom. She would come with me, but once she realized where we were heading, she would take off. This happened all morning long. After lunch we still had no luck. She wasn't wearing a diaper, so I knew she hadn't gone all day. I decided to try a new tactic.

I said, "Tralee, let's go sit on the potty" and she answered, "No." I told her she had too. This didn't go over well, and she tried to think of every excuse not to. "Tralee go play," "Tralee watch a show," "Tralee tired, go night night." I told her she could do every one of those things AFTER she sat on the potty. She wouldn't let me near her, so I went and got the potty and sat it down in front of her. At this point she was saying, "No! Tralee wants to watch a show!" I told her, "As soon as you sit on your potty I'll put a show on for you." The tears started at this point (hers not mine) and she kept saying, "No! I don't want to." I then told Tralee I was going to count to three, and if she didn't sit down she would have to go to time-out. Here's how it went down."

Me: "One."

Tralee: "No! No! No!" (But moving closer to the potty.)

Me: "Two!"

Tralee: Sobbing at this point, but reluctantly sitting down on her potty

Me: "Good girl! Now I'll put a show on for you!"

Tralee: Stood up immediately, still crying.

I walked away to go find a show to put on and heard an ANGRY blood curdling scream. I turned around just in time to see Tralee pick up her potty chair and throw it across the room. She then looked up at me and knew she was in trouble.

So. . . she went to time out for that.

While I was listening to her wail in time-out I thought, "She's like a little wild horse that can't be broken." She has such a strong will. I wonder where she gets it from? (If you know me well, please don't answer that.)

We're back to me asking her every twenty minutes, "Do you need to use the potty?" and her answering, "No, I don't want to." I put the potty chair in front of her this morning without saying anything. She promptly picked it up, and put it back in the bathroom.

Am I doing something wrong? Or, do I just need to have patience and wait a while longer?

Help please!


10 comments:

amy said...

That's rough. Brady was tough to potty train, but I didn't try very hard. I pretty much gave up, but as summer approached, we told him that he couldn't go swimming in the pool until he was potty-trained because they didn't allow kids in swim diapers. He slowly became potty-trained. However, he still has issues. Playing the computer, or just playing in general, often takes precedence over relieving himself properly. I wish I had kept track of how many times he's peed his pants when he was perfectly capable of walking 10 steps to the bathroom. Wait, though, since I'm venting...even when he is in the proper room, the bathroom, he often misses. I'd almost rather have him back in diapers.

Amberly said...

I'm sending you an email right now. potty training should not be so hard on you or her!

The Kelly Variety said...

I so wish I had some brilliant words of advice, but all I can say is I hate cleaning up pee! I hate pee messes. You'd think having as many kids as I have that I'd just learn to LOVE it, Nope.

Boom said...

Did you try the "Disney" plea. She needs to go on the potty if she want to go to Disney in October. Good luck!

Grammy Char Char

Cammi said...

Okay so first of all I need to say sorry because I laughed right outloud when she picked up her chair, screamed, and threw it across the room.. But I am saying sorry because I know how LONG of a process this has been for you!! I dont have kids so I dont have any advice to give but I will pray for you and her to get through it!! You are doing a good job Les, keep it up! Love ya and good luck!

Judy Jacobs said...

I'm not sure I have the answer but sticking to your word is the best. With my girls I said that they couldn't do something or get something unless they tried to go potty and then stuck to that until they sat for abit and tried. I praised them afterwards and then did what I said I would if they atleast gave a good effort. They soon figured out that if they wanted to go for a walk or get a treat or whatever they had to go potty first. If Tralee won't even try when you coax her with a prize, then make sure you don't give it to her until she gives it a good effort. Remind her she won't get the prize unless she tries to go potty. I don't know, maybe Nik and Chan were just easy potty trainers. Oh, I never left them alone on the potty, I stayed with them and reminded them what prize they would get if they were good girls and went potty. If she won't try, then say ok, no movie, or treat or can't go play with other kids until you try. Bribe them. It worked for me.

Jim said...

I have no clue, but it's better than taking soiled (#2) underwear and hiding it in the neighbors indoor flower planter.

dad

Necha said...

We finally have Tessa potty trained. She even goes through the night! :) My advice is this: 1-Be consistent...no matter what, be consistent. 2-When you do it, just take diapers and pull ups away for good. Just say DONE and deal with the messes. Otherwise she will just get confused. 3-Even take away diapers for night time. Deal with the messes! Seriously. Then make sure she goes before bed, and wake her up again at midnight. After I did that, Tessa got night time potty training in ONE night-no kidding. Before I started getting her up she wet the bed every night. 4-Don't make her potty train if she isn't ready. Sometimes 2 year olds aren't ready. Sometimes even 3 year olds aren't. If she flat out refuses don't force the issue. It's ok to coax her, but if she feels like going potty isn't HER thing she won't want to do it. And Last-5 Give her a treat when she goes. I used marshmallows, and a sucker for pooping. Pooping takes longer. (We still have accidents with the pooping.) Good Luck!! She will get it! I promise. She isn't going to be 16 and still in diapers. :)

Audie said...

Like Cammi, I laughed when I read about her throwing the potty. I spit on my computer a little bit too! Potty training isn't easy but what worked best for us was letting Jovie decide when she wanted to do it. Because she didn't want to go to bed, she would say that she needed to pee. This allowed her to stay up later and she got a feel for her potty. Then after a few nights of doing this she finally went in it. I praised her so much that she wanted to go every night at bed time. Have her kitty sit on the potty and discreetly dump water behind it and say kitty peed on the potty!

Hannah S said...

Ya, um, it took Samuel a year to figure it out. Have you tried a potty doll? That sort of helped with Jocelyn. But she didn't actually get trained until another year later....you MUST be patient and kind. That is all I can say. prayer and phood blessings too. It's a hard time.